Things I Keep From My Wife

Posted on March 31, 2021

News of animals, their misfortunes. Hopefully she has not seen these stories. I wouldn’t know.

Broken egg yolks. I give her the perfect yellow rounds, the slightly bigger shrimp, the cookie with more chocolate chips. I am nothing if not vigilant.

Worry about her health, especially her asthma. My anxiety will not help her breathe.

Worry about my own health. The little things. My body is my job, not hers.

Silly, daily mistakes I make. Which might, at this age, cause her concern.

My soiled childhood. This is what therapists are for, to hear the words that must be said to those will not be gutted.

Behavior I regret, the pages of our book I want to rip out. Admission is not absolution. Instead of infecting her with these images, I offer myself now, the improved version, the best I can muster. So far.

Published by

Jean Ryan

Jean Ryan, a native Vermonter, lives in Lillian, Alabama. Her stories and essays have appeared in a variety of journals and anthologies. She has also published a novel, LOST SISTER. Her short story collections, SURVIVAL SKILLS and LOVERS AND LONERS, are available online. STRANGE COMPANY, a collection of short nature essays, is available in paperback as well as digital and audio editions. View all posts by Jean Ryan

12 thoughts on “Things I Keep From My Wife”

Shruba March 31, 20213:58 am Reply

💜
1. Jean Ryan March 31, 20212:38 pm Reply
  
  Thank you for stopping by.
  1. Shruba March 31, 20218:05 pm
    
    I had no words to say, it’s so personal and moving. Thanks for sharing this with us! 🤩
  2. Jean Ryan April 1, 20212:31 am
    
    ❤️
robertmontagnese March 31, 20217:10 am Reply

Amazing and beautiful I’d love to live through your lens for even just a day. So smart, insightful, and generous. Thank you.
1. Jean Ryan March 31, 20212:39 pm Reply
  
  Robert, that might be the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me. Thank you so much.
Janet March 31, 202111:04 am Reply

As always, your most lovely self, Jean. You are adored for all you are.
1. Jean Ryan March 31, 20212:40 pm Reply
  
  Blushing with pleasure and gratitude. Love you, Janet
Lillian J. Richmond March 31, 202111:24 am Reply

How profoundly loving. Powerful brevity. I loved it.
1. Jean Ryan March 31, 20212:42 pm Reply
  
  Thank you, Lily. I do think there is power in brevity.
John Higgins March 31, 202111:46 am Reply

Bella! I am floored by your generosity, honesty and courage. Ive already gone back to read this at least a dozen times today. Powerful. Selah! Happiest Springtime to You & Cindy. XOXO
1. Jean Ryan March 31, 20212:43 pm Reply
  
  Right back at you, my wise and loving friend. You see the best in everyone and everything.